22 Aug Meet: Kira
Hi, I’m Kira.
I’m currently a clinical psychology grad student specializing in LGBT couples and families. I identify as a gay polyamorous kink and sex positive individual (oh boy that’s a mouthful!) But, being polyamorous is something that really opened my eyes to a sex positive world. Polyamory is defined as, the philosophy or state of being in love or romantically involved with more than one person at the same time. Here’s my story:
I guess it really started when something negative grew into something incredible. Several years ago my partner (at the time) had an affair. While I was certainly devastated, it took me by surprise that what really bothered me wasn’t the affair so much as just feeling like my partner didn’t come to me and let me know needs were not being met first. That realization and some time for healing as a couple eventually lead me to researching open relationships and Polyamory . And it happened to fit everything the two of us wanted.
We wanted the freedom to form relationships with others without feeling like we couldn’t keep what the two of us had with each other at the same time. It took lots of open honest and transparent communication… and patience. While we did struggle with things like jealousy and insecurity, the open communication led us to a deeper more healthy relationship than we’d ever experienced before.
We eventually both fell in love with another person and learned what it felt like to be in love with more than one person at a time… and even more, we experienced compersion. Several years have passed and when I came out as gay, lots of relationships changed, though once again, all for the better. But I still deeply believe in alternative love, like Polyamory, as well as the importance of living a life that’s sex and love positive!
In fact, I plan to dedicate my career to sex positive therapy specifically for the LGBT community. Sometimes it’s hard to look past what might be considered “normative” relationships to dive into something challenging and different… but for me, it changed my life for the better.
I live happier and love stronger and more honestly than ever before.
With (many) Loves,